The opposite of trying hard and how to do it
Trying hard IS hard. It’s effortful and energy-draining.
What’s the opposite?
Ease and flow.
How does it feel to move through your days this way?
lighter
free-er
more joyful
more peaceful
more confident and proud
If you’ve been in the habit of ‘trying hard’, here’s how you shift into ease and flow:
1. Literally stop saying the words ‘trying hard’ and replace them with words that at least feel more neutral: “I’m up for the challenge.” “I’ve decided to do this and so I’m going to show up and simply do my best.”
Because remember — if you’ve decided to do something, you also have the power to choose how you will move through it. Is trying hard the empowered stance you want to choose for yourself?
2. Practice staying now and present in your body vs. up in your head where your incessant thoughts reside. This is how you take your power back from over-thinking the same disempowering thoughts that make you feel heavy and drained.
3. Take the next small action now. Any action. Because action, no matter how small, wins over thinking any day of the week.
Here’s an example:
You want to get up earlier to walk before you start your work day.
What it looks like when you have to try hard:
At 6pm the night before you already start thinking about how dreadful this will be. Your thoughts are focused on how tired you’re going to be and how you’re not going to want to get out of bed.
At 9pm you’re still up in your head inner-fighting about how hard it’s going to be but that you need to just do it. You spend the rest of your evening with your partner not fully present with them because you're too busy with all of your thoughts.
You don’t sleep well and when your alarm goes off you lay in bed and argue with yourself some more and weigh out the pros and cons of just starting fresh tomorrow (and staying in bed today).
You finally decide to try hard and you force yourself out of bed for the walk.
After the walk? You feel joyful and you’re proud of yourself for doing it.
What it looks like when you have ease and flow:
At 6pm the night before you think about your commitment you made to yourself to get up early the next morning to walk.
You briefly have a few over-thinking thoughts about this new time, recognize how heavy it makes you feel to think this, and then intentionally come back to now and decide to remind yourself why you’re choosing to do this — because walking first thing in the morning makes you feel better.
You go back to being fully present and relaxed with your partner, sleep well, and when your alarm goes off the next morning you choose to get up and walk.
After the walk? You feel joyful and you’re proud of yourself for doing it.
Which example uses up a lot of your energy and time? Which one adds more joy, peace, and confidence?
When you learn how to manage your mind and stay now your whole world opens up! You accomplish more and have more fun in the process :)
Pay attention today and experiment with moving through things you’ve decided to do with more ease and flow and let me know what you discover!
Want more help with this? Schedule a discovery call with me and let’s see what working together could look like.
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