Accepting change is easier when you do this
“Accept –– then act. Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you have chosen it…This will miraculously transform your whole life.” Eckhart Tolle
Change? Noooooo! I have everything worked out just perfect thank you.
I used to get my shorts all up in a wad when work or family circumstances, the weather, and even strangers changed up my ‘plan’. And believe me, everyone would know about it.
CHANGE THREW ME FOR A LOOP BECAUSE IT MADE ME VULNERABLE AND NOT ‘IN CONTROL’ LIKE I ALWAYS (FALSELY) BELIEVED I WAS.
The result was stress, anxiety, temper tantrums, pouting, and a lot of wasted time and energy.
Having to think up an alternative plan was intense and done with a lot of huffing and puffing, drama, and a bad attitude.
Thank my lucky stars that this shenanigans is (mostly!) a part of my past.
I’m a planner and I’m always talking about properly planning things out and how that leads to success and goal achieving. I still believe that but what has helped me tremendously is letting go of exactly how the plan is going to roll out.
The nature of life is that change is constant and wrapping your head around that is a game changer (and life saver!) for sure.
CHANCES ARE HIGHLY PROBABLE THAT HOW YOUR PLAN PLAYS OUT IN REAL LIFE IS NOT GOING TO MEET THE EXPECTATIONS IN YOUR HEAD. THE EXPECTATIONS THAT MAKE YOU CRAZY.
So what do you have the power to do about it?
At the risk of quoting an already over-quoted animated movie:
LET IT GO!
Make your plan and get good at not being totally married to it until death do you part. Learn to let go of expectations (that are rarely met) and instead adopt a ‘go with the flow’ attitude.
I challenge you to start viewing change from another vantage point that is not only healthy but frees up so much of your time and energy!
This week’s experiment:
When you find yourself getting worked up over something that isn’t going according to your plan do these three steps:
- Reset! Get away from the situation or from your thoughts and go for a walk. Be present with nature. At the very least, take ten really deep, slow breaths.
- Accept what is. Example: You plan to take the day off work to read and re-charge your batteries and then you wake up to a flood in your basement. See step #1 and then simply accept what is. Accepting it allows you to move forward, and out of, the situation much quicker.
- Create a new plan and then act on it. There are many ways to get to your destination and this gives you an opportunity to get creative and figure them out.
And one more thing:
Be on the lookout for signs as to why your plan changed. I can look back at even the crappiest events in my life and see why they didn’t happen according to my ‘plan’. It was typically something I needed to learn, a person being put in my path for a reason, or that it wasn’t the ‘right’ time.